“If you keep carrying everyone’s problems, you’ll end up running out of time while they run out of work.”

Have you checked out this well-known article?

Let’s be real,whether you’re a manager, team leader, or just someone who likes to “help,” chances are you’ve taken on more than your fair share of monkeys. No, not literal monkeys, but those sneaky little things we call problems. They come in many forms,urgent emails, last-minute tasks, “quick” questions from your team,and before you know it, your day’s derailed, and everyone else is kicking back, waiting for you to solve their stuff.

Sound familiar? Yeah, you’re not alone. Let me tell you about Lisa, a customer service manager who learned the hard way that trying to be everyone’s hero just leads to burnout.

Lisa and the Monkey Problem

Lisa was the kind of manager who wanted to keep her team happy and her customers even happier. Anytime a team member brought her a complaint, she would jump right in, take over the problem, and work on a solution herself. It worked for a while,her team loved her, and things got done. But then, something weird happened.

Lisa noticed she was staying late every night, completely swamped, while her team seemed to be… well, kinda chilling. The more monkeys her team handed her, the less they had to do. Lisa became the bottleneck, and her team stopped taking initiative because, hey, why bother when the boss will handle it?

Monkey

The Shift: Stop Carrying the Monkeys

One day, Lisa had a lightbulb moment. She realized that by taking every problem handed to her, she wasn’t helping,she was hurting both herself and her team. So, she decided to switch things up.

The next time Jones, one of her team members, came to her with a customer complaint, instead of saying, “I’ll handle it,” Lisa smiled and said, “Great. Here’s what we’ll do,why don’t you draft a quick report on the issue, propose a solution, and we’ll review it together?”

Boom. Monkey returned. Jones walked away, still carrying the problem, but now with clear guidance on what to do next.

How to Manage Monkeys Without Losing Your Mind

Want to stop carrying everyone else’s monkeys? Here’s how Lisa turned things around:

Spot the Monkey
When someone brings you a problem, ask yourself: Is this my monkey or theirs? If it’s not yours, don’t take it.

Hand It Back (Nicely)
Instead of jumping into problem-solving mode, guide them on how to handle it. Use phrases like, “What do you think we should do?” or “Can you draft a plan, and we’ll review it together?” This way, you’re helping without taking ownership of the task.

Set Boundaries Monkeys thrive on chaos. Don’t let people hand you problems randomly throughout the day. Instead, set up specific times for check-ins or problem-solving meetings. That way, you stay in control, and your team learns to handle things on their own.

Why This Works

Lisa’s new approach didn’t just save her time,it empowered her team. By handing monkeys back, she encouraged her team to think for themselves, take responsibility, and only involve her when they really needed to. And guess what? The team got better, faster, and more confident. Lisa finally had time to focus on the big picture instead of firefighting all day.

Final Takeaways

  • Monkeys = Problems. Don’t let other people’s problems become yours.
  • Keep the responsibility where it belongs. Guide your team, but don’t do their work for them.
  • Boundaries matter. Set clear processes for when and how issues should be brought to you.

Final Thoughts

If you keep carrying everyone’s monkeys, you’ll end up exhausted while they kick back. So next time someone tries to hand you a problem, don’t just take it. Help them figure out how to handle it themselves. You’re a leader, not a zookeeper.

Remember, rookie,stop carrying the monkeys. Start leading the team.

References

  1. Harvard Business Review - Who’s Got the Monkey?
    • A classic piece on delegation and time management by William Oncken Jr. and Donald L. Wass.*
  2. Leadership Freak - Delegation
    • A blog with practical tips on delegation and leadership.*
  3. Greater Good Magazine - Empowering Teams
    • Research-based insights on leadership and empowering others.*